MITCHELL: Alex Hawke Wins In Landslide

The OC can exclusively report that Alex Hawke has won the Liberal Party preselection with a thumping 75% of the vote, bumping off long-time incumbent Alan Cadman, once named "Araldite" by Paul Keating because he was so attached to his seat. The seventy year old Cadman was first elected in 1974, some four or five years prior to Alex's birth.

We can expect the Fairfax/ABC mafia to try to thump Hawke. His crimes include once championing voluntary student unionism (now the policy of both major political parties), roughing up political opponents (the press of course never does that) and not listening to JJJ. No doubt he'll cop a brutal caning for being a yoof elected to the Parliament while declining to wear Doc Martens.

Congratulations to the OC Investigations Unit once again for being first with the latest and indeed to bright young thing Alex Hawke who'll probably do quite well in Club Fed.

Game on.